Repenting Before God - Answers for Jewish Survivors of Incest and other forms of childhood sexual abuse.

Many survivors of childhood sexual abuse have many questions regarding Teshuva (repenting). There's a converstation going on here that may be of interest to others.

Rabbi Yosef Blau posted the following statement that I thought other survivors would find helpful. For more information on this the topic of Teshuva contact your local rabbi or post your questions here and hopefully we can help you find an answer.

The concept is that if a sin is between two humans then repenting before God is insufficient. This is where the notion of apologizing comes in, together with redressing the damage caused (aplicable in monitary matters). If the repentent is sincere and the other party refuses to accept the apology after three unsuccessful attempts it is no longer neccessary to further apologize.

Applying it to an abusive parent can be complicated . Rarely does the abuser or the enablers take responsibility for what occured. A formal insincere apology need not be taken seriously. It is often part of a manipulation to reverse things and make the survivor feel guilty. Individual situations may not lend themseves to to a general answer.

Yosef Blau