Sunday, May 28, 2006

Survivor Happenings In Baltimore - Be a part of the solution!

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BREAKING THE SILENCE -- There are few events happening in Baltimore for Jewish Survivors of Sexual Violence (survivors of childhood sexual abuse, sexual assault, clergy abuse (rabbinic sexual misconduct), professional sexual misconduct. These events are open to all Jewish Survivors regardless of your affliation or unaffiliation.

Survivors of Sexual Violence Meeting with Baltimore Rabbis

Tuesday - May 30, 2006 at 5:00 pm

Yacov is organizing a group of survivors to speak to a few orthodox rabbis at a time. The first meeting was attended by 18 survivors, 2 rabbis and 1 educator. The meeting met for 3 hours. Each survivor took a turn sharing their abuse history. No comments were allowed until all eighteen survivors were finished.

A second meeting is set with 3 more rabbis. The meeting will take place on Tuesday, May 30th at 5:00 pm If you are a survivor and interested in participating please contact Yacov, or Vicki Polin at The Awareness Center (443-857-5560).

Jewish Survivors Networking Meeting sponsored by The Awareness Center, Inc.
Monday - June 5, 2006, 7:30 pm - 9:00 pm
Please share this message with Jewish survivors of sexual violence who live in Baltimore, Washington DC; Silver Springs, MD; Southern Pennsylvania.

The Awareness Center sponsors a self-help/networking group meeting for Jewish survivors of sexual violence on the first Monday of every month in Baltimore, MD. The next meeting will be on Monday, June 5 at Etz Chaim.

The meeting is open to Adult Jewish Survivors of incest, childhood sexual abuse, sexual assault, professional sexual misconduct, clergy abuse (rabbinical sexual misconduct The meeting is free, yet a $5.00 donation is requested.

For more information call The Awareness Center at: 443-857-5560


Anonymous yacov said...

this meeting is open to any survivor of sexual abuse and/or assault in or out of the community. for the safety and anonymity of all attending you must contact me, if you want to come.
the more survivors that come the stronger our voice will be. please join us!

May 28, 2006 6:05 PM  
Blogger yeshivaguy said...

Who were the rabbonim, and what did they say?

May 28, 2006 6:51 PM  
Anonymous yacov said...

for safety and anonymity specific names and locations will not published on this blog. i will be more than happy to give you specifics, but you must contact me.
one rabbi said (and this is a quote) "a perpetrator has a DIN (jewish law)of a RODEF (murderer)". he continued to say that although we should not kill our perpetrators, we must go to the police and report them!
the other one said that he would speak about it in his shul and, actually he is the one who set up the second meeting.
they were all incredibly humbled by the experience and committed to being a part of the solution. all of them are willing to help on an indivdual basis as well and only within thier own limitations. (i.e. they will not conduct investigations as they are not trained)they have all committed to continue thier education.
With the educator, we are working on a program to bring into the schools. middle school and high school. i will continue to update after tuesdays meeting. i hope you will be there!

May 29, 2006 8:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yacov, are you going to the meeting on the 5th too? I'm thinking of joining your efforts, but I don't know you and I want to get a feel for who you are. I figured if you were at that meeting I would at least get to meet you, without you knowing who I am.

May 29, 2006 8:59 AM  
Blogger Un-Orthodox Jew said...

Keep up the great work!

May 29, 2006 9:21 AM  
Blogger yeshivaguy said...

I don't see what's unsafe about publishing the names of the rabbonim.

May 29, 2006 11:26 AM  
Anonymous yacov said...

send me an email and i will give them to you.

May 29, 2006 6:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You don't know Baltimore. I think it's very brave of any of the rabbis to come to meet survivors. We don't want the rabbis who do to be harassed.

May 29, 2006 7:36 PM  
Anonymous Shalom said...

I know many people are angry at the way the Baltimore community has handled things in the past, and the way they are currently handling situations.

The solution to these sorts of problems is NEVER violence! The solution is education!

When we can't get the system in place to work for us, we need to find a way to bring the problems out in the open. Publicity is always helpful.

Have you ever thought of picketing in front of Ner Israel where Rabbi Neuberger is located? Or picketing in front of Heinemann and Hopfer's shuls? You do this and get media attention things will change much faster.

Violence is NOT a short term solution to sexual abuse or assault. Violence begets more violence.

May 31, 2006 6:51 PM  
Anonymous yacov said...

hello everyone!
we had the second survivor/rabbi meeting last night. it was attended by 6 survivors and 5 rabbis. i know that a lot of you could not make it due to the timing. for next meeting we will definitely choose a better time. it was a very positive meeting and i feel like we have a solid core of rabbis who are willing to stand up, take action and make a difference. R' said again that a perpetrator has a Din of a Rodef (halachik status of a murderer) and we must bring these matters to the attention of the authorities, i.e. Police, F.B.I., etc. They all were in agreement with him. R' mentioned that our priorty as a community aught to be to have a system in place to deal with the cases that are going on right now. not to ignore the past, we must try to undue the wrongs of the past. but we need to start with the present. i agree with that.
i think our next step is with the rabbis. a call to action, a public forum, something. we are all open to ideas and suggestions. lets keep in mind that our goal is to create a POSITVE AWARENESS that will be heard by the community.
i am gathering a group of clinicians to educate the rabbis from their side. i will let you know when that happens.
i will be meeting with our Educator after Shavous to discuss an outline for the school program.
please get back to me with your comments, suggestions and most importantly how you are willing to help!
once again, i am blessed to have shared another incredibly courageous experience with my fellow survivors. thank you all for being there. and thank you to the rabbis who are stepping up to the plate with the absolutely toughest challenge we could choose in a community. i would not want to be in your shoes!
God Bless and God Speed to all.
i can be reached at

May 31, 2006 6:55 PM  
Anonymous yacov said...

we are taking small steps forward. i was asked to present to the principals association meeting in the next couple of weeks. this came as a direct result of our first rabbi/survivor meeting. i will basically talk about our awareness campaign and our school program that we are in the process of developing. as always, i am open to suggestions and comments. and before you ask... i do believe that eisgrau is supposed to be there and i am very much looking forward to that!

June 19, 2006 10:30 AM  
Anonymous chavah said...

are you going alone? or bringing a group of survivors? what is your goal? what to do you hope to accomplish?

June 19, 2006 4:01 PM  
Anonymous yacov said...

for the initial presentation i am going alone, though it might be a good idea to have others with me. are you volunteering? the goal is to inform the principals about the educational process that we are involved in and also to give them the opportunity to participate. to bring sexual abuse right into the forefront of thier minds so that we as a community can make positive changes i.e. having a school program that deals with abuse, what a teacher should do if a student confides, how to spot a teacher who is a perpetrator, etc.

June 19, 2006 9:50 PM  
Anonymous chava said...

I know your heart is in the right place, and there is so much good potential that's going to come out of what you are doing.

I think a good idea is to get a bunch of (grounded) survivors together and discuss what everyone thinks is a good idea. Many heads are better then one.

I think sitting around for an hour, getting a wish list together of what other survivors think should happen at this meeting would only benefit your end result.

Remember, you still can do what you want to do, a brainstorming meeting will only help you.

I think it would be good if you had two other survivors going with you. It would be great if one of them was a therapist and one was an attorney. I think making this a sort of all survivor coalition is a great idea. You don't have to tell anyone at the meeting that they are survivors. But at least you know they are all coming from the right place.

June 20, 2006 8:41 AM  
Anonymous yacov said...

that sounds like a great idea. would you contact me, please?

June 21, 2006 10:04 AM  
Anonymous Chava said...

I should be at the next survivors networking meeting. I don't feel
comfortable communicating with people I meet on blogs.

If I see you at the next meeting and I feel comfortable at the meeting I'll tell you who I am.

June 21, 2006 11:31 AM  

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