Friday, October 28, 2005

It is very tempting to take the side of the perpetrator - Judith Herman

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"It is very tempting to take the side of the perpetrator. All the perpetrator asks is that the bystander do nothing. He appeals to the universal desire to see, hear and speak no evil. The victim, on the contrary, asks the bystander to share the burden of pain. The victim demands action, engagement and remembering."
-- Judy Herman

1 Comments:

Blogger Chavah5760 said...

As a victim of rabbinic sexual misconduct, who has been shunned and ostracized by my own people after speaking out against my abuser, I read this post and cried. It literally resonates with truth. Yes, victims are uncomfortable and inconvenient to deal with - we do not bring tidings of great joy. No one wants to believe that the rabbi who married them, or presided over their children's Bar and Bat Mitzvah's is an abuser. But G-d help them if they refuse to listen and turn their backs on the victims. We, as Jews, are commanded to not stand idly by while our neighbor bleeds. This would include those who have been abused by rabbi's and desperately need their communities help and support. Yes, it is tempting for the community to pretend that victims of rabbinic sexual misconduct do not exist...but the next victim may well be someone close, in the family - we are all at risk as long as this problem is not taken seriously and adressed in an appropriate manner, with prevention as the first priority.
Chavah
"Rabbinic Sexual Misconduct Survivor"

November 06, 2005 12:06 AM  

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