The Courage of Being Proud To Be A Survivor Of Sexual Victimization (Incest, Rape, Sexual Assault, Sexual Abuse)
Surviving abuse is not an easy task. Many of us our haunted by our PTSD symptoms. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. But from these symptoms many of us develop wonderful skills. Survivors often have a heightened awareness of things. Many of us are dedicated readers, and researchers. Many of us become doctors, lawyers, psychotherapists, accountants, parents, teachers and rabbis. Think about what positive ways being violated made you a stronger person?
Do you think that people like Oprah Winfrey, Joan Biaz, Carlos Santana, would be who they are today if their childhoods were not challenged in the way they were?
I know this may sound strange, but think about it. Maybe we should make a list of famous survivors we all know?
Do you think that people like Oprah Winfrey, Joan Biaz, Carlos Santana, would be who they are today if their childhoods were not challenged in the way they were?
I know this may sound strange, but think about it. Maybe we should make a list of famous survivors we all know?
posted by Jewish Survivors at Tuesday, February 22, 2005
6 Comments:
Isn't Lynda Carter (Wonder Woman) an incest survivor?
"Think about what positive ways being violated made you a stronger person?"
I'm probably being overly sensitive here, but I would *never* say ANYTHING positive came out of my abuse---but I *would* say positive things came out of my various journeys of struggle to survive and heal.
No matter how much I may achieve in life, there will always be a sorrow when viewing others with close, loving families. I was robbed and cheated out of knowing what it is to have a safe, loving, nurturing, respected, cared for environment as a child.
It is fantastic to be able to go on to achieve great things---but some of us dream only for some semblance of peace of mind, safety. Some end up breaking in midlife and some end up on disability.
I'm sure this wasn't worded the way it sounds. I do understand what Jewish Survivor said, and also what you said about feeling "cheated and robbed".
I've been mourning my childhood, and also my family of origin for many years. It's very painful especially around the holidays, and if and when I decide to go to Temple.
I love kids, and being around them, but when I am I think about my own family and how it's too toxic to be around them. When I go to services at Temple I see families. I sometimes worry about some of the kids I see, wondering if they are being abused too, other times it just puts me right back in that feeling of mourning.
There have been some positive things that came out of me being a survivor. I do look at the world through different colored lenses. I'm able to relate to people on a totally different level. It comes from years of being on my healing journey. I'm able to spot another survivor a mile away. I also am sure I can spot an offender in the same way. I'm able to talk to others and warn them of abusive behavior when I see it. I'm able to share my life story with others that often offers them hope.
I guess it's up to each of us if we want to continue being in the victim role, or that of a survivor.
Believe me, there's times that I slip into the victim roll too. I know that will be a struggle I'll have the rest of my life, but each time I do I learn something new about myself. By doing that I also learn to help others too.
Thank you for your response.
I guess it's up to each of us if we want to continue being in the victim role, or that of a survivor.I wonder if there are varying degrees between the two, I have never felt fully like one or the other.... Or perhaps there's just not phrasing yet to word the various states.
There have been some positive things that came out of me being a survivor. I do look at the world through different colored lenses. I'm able to relate to people on a totally different level. It comes from years of being on my healing journey. I'm able to spot another survivor a mile away. I also am sure I can spot an offender in the same way. I'm able to talk to others and warn them of abusive behavior when I see it. I'm able to share my life story with others that often offers them hope.I have been thinking about this ever since you posted it, and I appreciate your having done so. When I am in periods of being well, I can say those things for myself, too.
Now to just be able to have longer periods of being well.
I'm glad you posted this, because it has helped spur a lot of thoughts on and off.
I've been thinking about the definition of "success". We look to Oprah Winfrey frequently as an example, which is good to do, as she "is" a great example.
And then I think about her struggles with weight gain/weight loss, and wonder if there haven't still been some lingering emotional scars that have not completely healed, yet, for her.
(weight problems and anorexia being two of the most frequent symptoms of problems survivors of childhood abuse suffer).
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